• rhicrks

Dear me in 5 years

Updated: May 27

Hi...

If my maths is correct you're now less than a month off of being 23. Congratulations! If all went according to plan you've finished your degree now and you're out in the field putting it to use.

I just have a few questions, if you've got the time, that I'd be curious to know the answers to...

Have you started thinking about marriage, kids maybe? Where are you living now? Are you happy with how things turned out?

Have you learnt how to braid hair yet? .

Did you end up publishing that book? The one I've been putting off for over a year? I hope you did... and I hope you're really proud of how it turned out.

Did you finally get over caring so much about what others think? Have you learnt to stand up for yourself when somethings happening that you don't agree with?

Are you still a little bit scared of the dark?

Did you end up needing to change a tyre?

Do you miss me... the person you were at 17?

If you could go back and talk to me what would be the first thing you say?

What advice would you give me? Are you proud of the way you acted, treated others and lived day in and day out? Am I the person you'd be happy to tell your grand-kids about?

What did it feel like to graduate? Did you get to throw your hat? Were you able to find it again?

Did you make the most of university?

Did you keep this blog running...?

Do you still write?

And finally...

Have you learnt to love yourself?

I know that one's going to take some time but I think I'm ready to start now. I just want some sort of confirmation that I will, you know?

The world can be a terrifying and terrible place and sometimes I find myself feeling lost thinking about the length of the road ahead.

But I'm so good at thinking, hence this letter to you.

I'm so curious about the person you are today. I want to know how different you are to me, how much I changed or didn't change, if you're what I hope you will be.

You and I both know so much can happen in five years. There's such a large pool of 'unknowns' and it's kind of scary to think about.

And I know I'm supposed to let the pieces fall where they may but a part of me just wants to plan my path, every step, every crack. I need to know where I'm heading and that the road I walk is stable.

That's the problem though, in writing this I've realised I can't plan my future anymore than anyone else can. I can't ensure that anything happens. I just have to let what happens happen and hope that you find this in five years and can answer my questions.

Just ah... don't be living in a dump. Please.